How to tell a good story
When someone asks, "How was your day?" you ususally answer with a story, and it can sometimes be one word that conveys all it needs to for the listener to check right out. If you frequently answer that question with "fine" or "long," I'm here to teach you how to tell a new story; one that will positively engage your listeners and have them asking for more!
Unwind in your own way
After work our minds need a distraction from the focus of the day. Some people sit quietly in the car all the way home, and others of us crank the tunes, singing at the top of our lungs. Either way, our minds and bodies need that transition to help us move into the next phase of the day.
The stories we tell ourselves reflect how we think about our lives. If you dwell on the negative and dull then you're likely to sound, well, negative and dull to others. Every day, we get a new opportunity to experience something wonderful worth sharing, many in fact. Telling yourself and others a new story every day doesn't take extraordinary measures. A little curiosity and a pinch of silver lining will get you there in a blink.
The silver lining
Think of your daily life as chapters in a really good book. Here are some easy ways to categorize the events, feelings, and experiences of each day.
- Triumph
- Quest
- Comedy
- Rebirth
- A stranger came to town
From this moment forward be an active observer of your life. Summarize your day's activities in the context of one of the categories and POOF! Just like that, you have an interesting story to tell.
Here are some commonplace questions answered with examples with your new silver lining in place.
Co-worker: "Hey Samantha, how's it going?"
You (Triumph): "A little slower than most mornings. My car broke down so I called AAA. The guy was so pleasant and helpful, I actually gave him a big tip. I was on my way in no time."
Partner: "Hi Hon, how was your day?"
You (Comedy/A stranger came to town): "You know that big presentation I gave today? Well, I found out later that I gave it to the whole division and the vice president of the company, who showed up unannounced. I stood up to speak and realized that I had on two different color shoes. It threw me for a second, then I decided to make it part of my introduction. She loved the way I handled her showing up and my shoe debacle and told me, in front of my boss, that she thinks I'm going places in the company. How cool is that?!"
Both stories could have been told in a negative way, but were much more interesting and engaging when spun into happy.
The energy that you radiate affects you and those around you. Fill it with happiness and suddenly, everyone around you seems happier and more enjoyable to be around. It's a simple shift in mindset to happiness, and it's free!
Stories worth listening to
Try out your happiness mindset experiment with a co-worker, then try it out when you get home. You might surprise your partner when she asks, "Hi Hon, how was your day?" Be prepared for a double-take. If she doesn't hear you, just smile, get closer, and repeat. Focus on the positive and mix in the messy part as an aside. It feels good for everybody when you don't make the messy parts important.
Here's what this evening's conversation can sound like for you.
Your partner: "Hey Sweetie, how'd work go today?"
You (Rebirth moment shifting into happy): "On the way home, I ran late and hit rush hour traffic, so I listened to this really cool story on National Public Radio about this musician turned aid worker in Darfur. Amazing guy. Oh, and I picked up some coffee on the way home so we can enjoy it on the porch in the morning. How was your day?"
Now that's a story worth listening to. In fact, you might have to repeat it (remember, she may not be used to really paying attention, and you're not used to telling a story to share the highlights of your day.)
Soon, you can shift into happiness on command. Use commute time to be curious about your day and collect your story ideas. Try it on co-workers at lunch, over dinner with friends, and the next time you walk in the door to greet your family. "Fine" and "long" will be replaced with, "wow!" and "cool!"
What will your story be today?
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